Leak No More

With the aging of the baby boomer population, I suppose it was inevitable. But it wasn't until someone actually brought the product to my attention that I learned there was enough of a public outcry against anal leakage to market a tampon to staunch the problem. There's even a handy acronym to discreetly refer to the condition: ABL, or Accidental Bowel Leakage. As opposed to Deliberate Bowel Leakage. 

I love the predictable track the ad agency followed to address this issue: 1) assign the product a gentle, nature-inspired name like Butterfly. 2) Show not-too-decrepit middle-aged people so pleased to be vouching for the product that they're actually smiling about it, and 3) house the whole messaging effort in an inoffensive, carefully-worded "everybody does it eventually" format. 

I'm reminded of a campaign I worked on years ago for a potato chip that contained a chemical called Olestra. While the chip promised a lower level of cholesterol, Olestra was a synthetic that the human body just couldn't retain. I remember writing the fine print for the packaging that warned the consumer of inevitable "anal leakage." If only we'd been able to sell the chips in a value bundle that included Butterfly butt plugs.